YOU KNOW YOU'RE IN TEXAS WHEN . . .

I already posted nice things about San Antonio: the peaceful missions, the beautiful temple, the delicious food, the happenin' riverwalk. However, blogging about Texas just wouldn't be complete without a few chuckles.  Texans, I think, are at least as good at laughing at themselves as I am.

So here we go.  
YOU KNOW YOU'RE IN TEXAS WHEN YOU SEE:

Window displays that include both cactus and beer:

Politics mixed with religion in something called the Alamo Pachyderm Club:

Wall murals of native species like African lions:

(Note the politically correct man in a wheelchair on the left.Then note the legs behind the mural, a clue to how that man ended up in the wheelchair.

More fine art combining cactus with a very wild horse:

Texas pride t-shirts for sale everywhere you look:

 Bright streamers festooned across the walks (I loved these):

 The "Zero Milestone" on the Old Spanish Trail:

Wait. What is THIS doing in San Antonio?

Animals peering down at you from the walls as you eat just one more barbecued rib:

The magical, commercialized, mystical, tiny Alamo, Texas's biggest tourist attraction:

Patriotic armadillo ornaments for sale (Yeah, I bought one):

An obsession with Davy Crockett, the frontiersman and Alamo martyr immortalized by Walt Disney.  I'm pretty sure the main reason his name is familiar to 95% of the American population is because of this song:

Side note: According to a plaque in the San Fernando Cathedral, Crockett's body was exhumed in 1937 and supposedly PUT ON PUBLIC DISPLAY FOR A YEAR before he was re-entombed with other Alamo defenders in the Cathedral, which is a few blocks from where Crockett was killed at the Alamo:

I have been unable to verify that the claim that his body was on display is actually true.  In fact, most historians believe his ashes aren't here at all, but rather somewhere nearer the Alamo.

More Davy Crockett:

Even a hotel is named after Davy Crockett, although the placement of this sign so that it can be seen over the Alamo at night is a little bizarre:

The Alamo, aka the Crockett Hotel, where Crockett checked in but never checked out.

Fine establishments directly across from the street, celebrating Texas history and lauding Crockett's heroism:

Guinness World Record Museum, Ripley's Haunted Adventure, Tomb Rider Ride and Arcade.  Classy.

In Texas's defense, I was really impressed by these parking meters, a place to deposit extra coins, which are collected periodically and used to buy food for the homeless:

Even better than that, while in San Antonio I had the best piece of German chocolate cake I have ever eaten, and I have eaten a lot of German chocolate cake.  Sure wish I could remember the name of the place where I bought it.

Yeah, it was definitely good enough to get me back to San Antonio some day.